I have been back to my country for 11 days now. With everything happening around me it was only slowly getting to me that I really did finish my one year in Bremen.
Waking up here, it always takes a moment for me to realize that I’m not in my room there, but here. On my first night being back, I thought I was hearing the sirens of the German ambulance, that became my lullaby living in Gröpelingen.
In the beginning of the project we wrote down our fears and wishes/expectations. Looking back at it makes me smile, and pleased. Although I did write some irrational fears, but all the wishes I wrote were very honest and most of them did come true -some of the fears did too.
One of my wishes was to find out why I’m there. I think I did find out; through discovering new desires, longings, having more and new questions.
Writing this report is difficult now, my head being full with all of the things that happened, the moving, and what will happen, but I will try to look at it from a distance.
One year ago I went to see my workplace for the next year -which was the Waldorfschule- for the first time. I remember being super confused, being put in a situation without anybody really explaining to me my role and tasks. I had the feeling that I understood things slowly, maybe too slowly; having so many questions that sometimes it was hard to even form them, not being sure who to ask, therefor being left with no answers. So I went on exploring how things worked on my own in many cases. It also just comes from my nature that I rather learn by myself, but considering the short time and the special conditions, I wish that I opened up earlier. After understanding my new workplace, it was still a huge challenge for me to work there. Not only because working with small children is generally testing, but also I had very little experience, and absolute no education on how to work in such place, and it was also nothing like I was told it would be.
But obviously I’m not intending to complain through my whole report -that would be super hungarian of me.
I believe with this one year working there, I learned much more, than I could’ve with any other opportunity, that I would’ve had in Hungary. I worked with a quite diverse group of people -not only culturally, but also spiritually-, which was difficult at times, but also enriched my experience a lot.
I started to feel more comfortable in my workplace, feel home in Bremen, when Winter came. Days were shorter and shorter, everything cold and dark, the moods of all the people I knew shifted, but what I didn’t realize at the time, Winter in a new city affected me deeper than it usually does. I wish that I saw that earlier, so that I would know how to treat it in a better way, but eitherway winter passed. And seeing the sun more, everybody started to feel better again. Spring and summer were filled with exciting opportunities, cool events, and generally spending time with others much more than in the winter.
Next to the school I spent a lot of my time sitting on trains. Thanks to dear Deutschlandticket, and to dear people I could explore quite a few cities in Germany. A place I kept returning to was Nordsee, I saw it through ebb and flow, in the morning, in the evening, and I still hope that I can visit it again sometime. For me Bremen was a chill city -most of the time- but there were always exciting places and happenings to find. I enjoyed going to the parks, the Fleamarket on sundays, strolling in Viertel -there were always interesting people to talk to-, or next to the river, alone or with company.
Leaving Bremen also meant leaving behind precious people. Some of them I know I will probably never see again, some of them I know I will, but either way it doesn’t leave any sorrowful feeling in me, because I got to meet and talk to them, and that I hope not to ever forget.
My year was rich with messing up things, being uncomfortable, exploring and learning, meeting many people from many places, feeling in ways I’ve never felt before. I am super happy and grateful that I chose Bremen for my volunteering, and I hope to see and experience many places the way I did see Bremen.
Luca was hosted by NaturKultur e.V. on our project co-funded by the European Union.
If you want to experience something similar to what Ana did, check out our open calls here.